From The Island Of Misfit Toys: 11 Recalled Barbies

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There have been more than 200 billion kinds of Barbie doll (we asked) and not all of them can be successful. Still, at a certain point, if you’re a toy exec you just should’ve known better. Here are 11 Barbies we hope somebody lost their job over.

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Obesity Awareness Barbie

This Barbie could’ve made headway against the worldwide bulimia epidemic, but only if someone bought her instead of those cheesy fries.
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Marissa Barbie

Barbie reflects an ideal. Marissa Barbie crossed the line; no little girl wants to look down upon a doll that’s looking down on her.
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Barbie Without Makeup

Nobody fantasizes about not wearing makeup. Know why? Because you can just…not put it on in the first place.
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Gangster Barbie

Nobody seemed bright enough to try marketing this to boys. Say hello to my little (girl)friend!
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Eating McDonald’s At The Olympics Barbie

This ‘two-themes-in-one’ approach simply left girls confused. What? You, too?
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Styling Head Barbie

Girls could easily apply makeup to this enormous, bodiless Barbie, but then what?
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Non-Shiksa Barbie

It turns out that tens of millions of little girls aren’t interested at all in having Barbie expound upon the subtleties of the Torah. That’s what GI Joe is for.
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Make A Wish Barbie

Maybe the problem was that this Barbie did not, finally, grant wishes, no matter how hard little girls rubbed her head while visualizing Justin Bieber naked.
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Business Barbie

We hear Business Barbie got downsized during the 2009 crash and took to drinking heavily.
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Happy Meal Barbie

Don’t you think this wholesome beauty is worth $15 an hour? Neither do we.
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Come And Get It Barbie

Again. While some girls do grow up to become cheap street-walkers, few actually fantasize about becoming one. No word on whether Ken be pimpin’.
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